The End of Vacation

So the days rolled by pretty much as described in the last blog. … Lazy and relaxing.  We began to spend more time in the villa as we had our own pool, our own ocean and we discovered that there was no charge for food delivery!  It was paradise.

Full Moon over the Maldives

Olga relaxing at the villa

Olga preparing for snorkeling off the villa

Trip preparing for snorkeling off the villa
Despite Doctors orders to stay out of the water 

Olga on one of the many jungle paths 

Trip on the way to Breakfast

Once we learned there was no additional charge for villa delivery,
this was pretty much the lunch scene every afternoon!

A friendly visit to the villa from a Manta Ray  

Mom and Dad squid

The whole squid family
I walked down the latter of the villa and was standing next to them
They did not seem to mind

Sunset from the Villa
It is low tide, so you can see the reef poking through
the surface of the sea in the distance

I can tell you that in my adult memory, I cannot remember any time when I simply did nothing, but recharge.  Every now and again there was a bit of excitement as a Manta Ray swam past the villa or a family of squid came by to say hello, but overall it was naps, punctuated by brief meals and long swims.  Other than the gash in my finger and the absence of hearing in my right ear, I felt great. But like all good things, this too had an expiration date and on Saturday, we were marshaled across the island for the boat that would begin our journey home.   

Olga on the boat with the villas in the background 

Our plane awaits

Pulling up to the floating platform

Last look at the Island

The villas from the air
If you count 7 from the left, that was ours

Our trip out of the Maldives was less of a magical journey than our trip in.  The seaplane arrived in Male without incident, but unlike our arrival, we were not chauffeured in a private car between the seaplane and main terminal, but placed on a bus with the rest of the island vacationers and driven back to the main terminal.  Our bags were placed in a different van and driven in the same manner.  When you arrive at the main terminal, it reminds you more of an open market, than an international airport.  There is a huge expanse of concrete with a tin roof above under which vans of people and bags spill out randomly.  This time, we spilled out, but our bags seem not to have made the same, simply straightforward trip. Our bags had been mislabeled at the resort as Mr. Lu’s bags and were being stacked for the Cathay Pacific flight to Hong Kong.   Realizing that our bags were not in the right place, Olga set about inspecting other piles until she found ours while I “motivated” our man from the hotel to do the same.  The bags were located and we were handed over to the men from our Male hotel.

We were loaded on to the Traders Hotel’s boat, just like when we arrived, and taken to Male where we would spend the next two nights.  Here is a traveler’s tip, if at all possible, do not spend any more time than necessary in Male.  Imagine the South Indian Ocean equivalent of Long Beach, CA. The whole purpose of the island is to move incoming supplies from freighters to smaller local vessels for the resorts with a secondary mission of fishing.  Cargo and fish do not make for a tropical paradise!

The Male Fish Market 

The Male Harbor

The Male Sea Front

As I said, we spent two nights in Male and by the time the stay was over we were ready to get on a plane and head home.  Isn’t funny how life tends to balance out the good and the bad?  After an excellent vacation during which I felt like a new person, the flight home turned into the flight from hell.

After arriving at the airport, checking in and passing through passport control, I discovered that I had left my faithful iPod companion of 5 years at the back of the safe in the hotel room.  This was disconcerting for several reasons.  First, I loved that iPod.  It was an older model and was the perfect combination of size and functionality.  Secondly, I had a very cool iPod cover for it.  Lastly, and most importantly, iPods are extremely expense in India, so I would not be replacing it until my next trip to the US and I have no earthly idea when that is going to be.  I use that iPod all the time – for music in the car, music in my office and especially to drowned out loud, obnoxious Indians on planes.  This was a critical loss for me. 

We boarded the plane, which left slightly early again (kudos to Sri Lankan Airways) and set about on our hour flight to Colombo, Sri Lanka.  The flight was relatively peaceful, but every now and again, I would hear commotion from the seats behind me.  As we were deplaning, the cause of the commotion pushed itself forward and made themselves know to all of us.  An Indian family of roughly 12, including what seemed to be the grandparents, their children and their childrens’ children were all traveling back to India.  They were loud, pushy and, well, a little smelly, but the flight was over and they were not my problem.  Or were they?

As we boarded our flight to Delhi, sure as shit, the aforementioned family crammed aboard.  My first encounter with them was in the jetway when apparently they felt that the queue did not apply to them.  In my authoritarian voice, I stepped out, stopped them and sent them back to their position at the end.  We boarded, got settled and the family once again appeared in the aisle.  This time, though, we had the misfortune of being seating with a third in front of us, a third behind us and a third across from us.  We were surrounded. 

The first thing that became apparent was that this was one of the first times this family had ever been on a plane. I would venture to say by their lack of hygiene and ignorant behavior, it might have been the first time they have been outside their village.  Boarded was an absolute melee.  They would not sit where they were assigned and when the stewardess (we still have stewardesses in the part of the world) finally got them in the right rows, they refused to sit and buckle in.  Even as we pushed back from the gate, these freak’n nutjobs were running to talk to each other 3 rows back. 

As soon as the wheels left the ground, they were all up again.  The stewardesses tried in vain to get them reseated, but they rushed out of their rows in twos and threes and overwhelmed even the staunchest resistance.  For the next three hours they screamed at each other across rows of passengers, ran up and down the aisle and generally caused mayhem the likes of which I have never seen on an airplane.  The flight crew was helpless. 

About 2 hours into the flight, the crew made a disastrous decision to sell duty free.  As the cart emerged, it was besieged by the family.  They thrusted the duty-free catalogues in the steward’s face and screamed and yelled for more stuff.  When they realized that not everything in the catalogue was available, they bought more of the stuff that was. The cart never got past the family the entire flight as they bought everything that was stocked.  Everything!

This group of animals left no air-travel faux-pas untouched:  they yanked themselves to their feet by pulling on the back of your seat; they ensured they bumped into you when they passed, which was roughly every 3 minutes; they yelled across several rows; and, of course, they had babies – screaming, crying babies.  In addition, because they could not sit for more than a few minutes, they dumped their food trays in the aisle so everyone could walk through the mess and treated the bathrooms on the planes like they were their personal outhouses.  They were, by all definition, the worst airline passengers ever! 

As we approached Delhi, the announcement came on to return to your seats and fasten your seatbelt.  This had no impact.  As the wheels touched down, there was one member of said family standing up in his seat.  Before the engines were out of reverse, the entire family was up in the aisles getting their bags and stood there until we pulled into the gate.  It was unbelievable. As we deplaned, the beleaguered crew bid us a defeated “good-bye.” I have never seen anyone so happy to have landed.

I could surmise that grandpa received a pretty large cash settlement for his farmland as developers continue to expand the greater Delhi area.  He had treated his once farm restricted family to a luxury vacation in the Maldives.  This is India’s new money! I wish I could say that this family and their outrageous behavior is the exception, but they are not. This is simply how they behave – this time, we had the misfortune to experience it on steroids. 

I am, though, truly thankful that we did not have this group of miscreants on the island with us, as I am pretty sure many of them would not have made it off alive.